Start With Yourself: Business Lessons from Emma Grede at Selfridges
At Selfridges, I attended a business and fashion event that felt less like inspiration and more like a strategic reset. As Complicated Coach, stepping into a room filled with founders, creatives, and early-stage entrepreneurs, the focus wasn’t just on success—it was on what actually sustains it.
Led by Emma Grede—co-founder of Good American and founding partner of SKIMS—the conversation centred around her book Start With Yourself. And from a business coach perspective, that message couldn’t be more relevant right now.
In coaching small business owners, one pattern shows up repeatedly: people look for external answers before addressing internal clarity.
Emma’s philosophy flips that.
Success doesn’t start with your product, your marketing, or your network. It starts with you.
That means:
Building confidence in your own decision-making
Understanding where you’re strong—and where you’re not
Creating opportunities instead of waiting for them
This is particularly critical in today’s fast-moving digital economy, where comparison and noise can easily cloud judgement. What Emma reinforced is that intentional growth always outperforms reactive hustle.
The Question no one else asked:
In a room full of entrepreneurs, I was the only one who put a hand up. I wanted to push beyond the polished advice and get to something real.
I asked Emma “You said you don’t enjoy the performative notion of women supporting women, you want the real stuff, when you say you want the real stuff—what’s your one piece of advice you would give?”
Emma’s response wasn’t sugar-coated. It centred on clarity and accountability—removing the fluff, the performative support, and focusing on what actually drives results:
Be honest about what’s working and what isn’t
Make decisions faster—even if they’re uncomfortable
Don’t hide behind effort; measure outcomes
That’s the “real stuff.” Not encouragement for the sake of it—but direction that forces growth.
From a coaching standpoint, this is where many founders get stuck. Being “busy” feels productive, but without clear feedback loops, it’s just motion—not progress.
The real work is in clarity + action.
Stop Chasing Perfect, Start Managing Reality
“Work-life balance” is one of the most searched topics among entrepreneurs—and one of the most misleading.
Emma reframed it in a way that every founder needs to hear:
Balance isn’t fixed. It’s fluid.
Depending on your stage of business and life:
Sometimes work will take priority
Sometimes life has to come first
Trying to achieve both equally at all times creates unnecessary pressure
As a business coach, this is where I see burnout begin—when founders believe they’re failing simply because their version of balance doesn’t look “perfect.”
The shift is simple but powerful: focus on self-awareness over symmetry.
Final Thought: Build From Within
Events like this can easily become a collection of quotes and fleeting motivation. But the real value comes from application.
What Emma Grede reinforced is something every business needs to internalise:
Your business outcomes reflect your internal standards.
Not your intentions.
Not your effort.
Your standards.
Because in the end, success isn’t just about what you build.
It starts with yourself.